Change is hard. Yet it's the only constant force in our lives. What makes it hard it attachment. In Buddhist Psychology, attachment is believed to be the source of pain and suffering. It's true.
For the last 5 years I've been slowly detaching from the source of my own pain in my own life. It's a process of letting go of the people that do not mirror your innate sense of self, and that self is wise, wild, and loving.
If you are on a Spiritual path, then you know that it is vital to surround yourself with people who reflect the goodness in you. If your relationships do not reflect the very best of what your spirit has to offer this world, and ignite the flame that causes you to feel comfortable enough to share and foster your unique gifts and talents, then these people need to be put in the periphery of your life, or removed altogether if you must. At the very least, they must be put at arms length while you grow back your Spiritual hands, the hands that grasp true meaning and offer you the ability to exercise unadulterated self-expression.
If you are surrounded by people who don't care, are cruel or mean, indifferent, passive, jealous and/or envious of your gifts, you must run away from them. These are not your people.
Your people are the ones who want to hear what you have to say about the world, the way you see it. Your people will be open to your ideas, celebrate your art, and inspire you to be vulnerable. They will stretch you, support you, and love you well. This is my vow to you, should you decide to take weighted stock of your human companions.
Before attracting these people into your vortex, you will need to dissolve. You will need to distance yourself, and seek solitude in order to grasp what you are holding, what you are missing, and what you need to grieve over. You have to give up what you have known, so that you can make room for the people and experiences that will enrich your life, causing you to inhabit a new frequency. You will need to burn up, and sink down, down, down, into the depths of your psyche, where the pressure from life's lessons point you towards a new horizon.
It is a painful process. I'm not going to sugarcoat it. Within that pain though, comes the gift of clarity. For those of you who are on the Spiritual path, you know this to be true. And the truth is this process is an initiation into embodying the sheer force of your spirit.
The Spiritual path is the wisest one to take. It is the answer. It is the way. The only thing to lean on, for those of us who are walking the path, is our hearts. When there is no lap to lay our heads on, we must reach for the One Who Knows. This force becomes our sustenance while we gain our footing in the topside world.
Until we gain our strength from being ravaged and tortured by both people and a sick culture who lack soul-full awareness, we will walk in a daze, all confused thinking "am I the problem?".
No, you are not the problem if you feel your heart is as wide and deep as all the oceans combined. You are a rare gem in a world that values the profane. Of course you will think you are insane when what you value is drastically opposed to those all around you.
This is why a break-up is needed. I do not know what you are facing right now, but if I did I would comfort you, because I know what's like to live in a world that does value your tender heart and the way you see.
What I have found is that until your desires, artful expressions, and yearnings take center stage of your awareness you may feel as though you are living a half-life. And a half-life is not good enough for you, sweet soul of heavenly body.
The remedy for enui, depression, and dis-ease is to commit to seeking deeper, yet higher ground. For a time you will wander in the dark with your hands outstretched in front of you stumbling around to find your way to your truth, but you must. It's all in your hands. Every tear you shed is a testament to the depth of your soul. So cry yourself a river. It does a soul-body good.
Along your way, there will be kind people who will be there right in the nick of time to assist you, when feel that the path is too arduous, too strenuous to endure. They will pick you up, brush you off, give you soul-full sustenance, and then be gone.
This process is one of endurance. This process allows you to grow your instincts and intuition. You will be better able to see who is good for you, and who is no good. But in order to trust yourself, you will need to be put through trials and you will be tested. Seek solitude, in nature. You need only touch where the sun shines on a leaf, to gaze on a bee gathering pollen, to notice a father embracing his child.
Your destiny lies on being able to make the distinction between who will enrich you and who will suck you dry, how long to stay, and when it is time to go. By going into the depths of your deepest knowing, which will require much solitude and communing in nature, you will become wisened. You will know and get a sense, rather quickly, which direction to turn and which decisions to make.
Once this process has been hastened a few times over your life, you will see that the process becomes less and less trying, because you will have gained a type of confidence that is unshakable, by having gone into the deep and resurfacing anew.
So break up, so you can breakthrough.
Namasté alive,
Marian xo
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